MASALAH YANG SUSAH DISELESAIKAN

a'uzubillah hissami'in alaihi miminashaitho nir rajeem minhamzihi wanafkhi wanafsih

ASSALAMUALAIKUMWARAHMATULLAH

selamat lewat malam...there are a few things tht i wanna talk about...few..maybe..

it is also about my whole prob (i think so)...memang aq dh x leh tahan dgn smua ni

selalu je bermain dlm fkiran aq...dan bnda ni bnyk bg kesan kapku(kat aku)..

n here we go.....oh yea...thx sbb klu sudi baca...n x pun...klu x sudi..im also thank you for visited my blog yg usng lagi buruk kelabukk nim...k...trima kasih sgt2..soo..lets go...

1.(vital one) masalah aq dengan suuu (if she is ur friend..im sorry for sebut nama dy kt dlm blog nim...sbb memang aq prlu jjur skrg..k)

welp...its been 3 days aq x terima msj dy...n i feel like "OMG...SHE SAID 3DAYS JE NK SLESAIKN SMUA MSALAH"..n now...it still did not selesai lg...n aq memang sgt2 down la kot...tkt smua nim berakhir or something like tht...atau something tht menuju ke arah tu..i know tht ad je org yg mmbantah ttg hbungan aq dgn dia...tp bkn senang nk lpskn ssorg yg bnyk memori kt kita...yg bnyk mnolong kita...dan SATU2NYA ORANG YANG KITA SUKA BERSAMA...n skrg..hbungan aq dgn suu x elok sgt...(maybe)...aq cuba nk mmperbetulkn smula...tp nmpk mcm aq dh x mmpu la kot...i tried to text her..dh try pun...tp she still x balas lg msj aq...aq x tahu samada dia ok ke x...aq tkt dy x ok je..seriously...klu ok..alhamdulillah la..smoga ok sentiasa..aq tkt trjadi hapa2 kt dy..haaa...tu yg number one priority aq...erm..to be honest..memang aq x akn lpskn dy..walaupun msalah bsar mana pun yg menimpa kt aq...semoga Allah menolong aq utk menangani msalah yg akn dtimpa tu...mng aq hrp sgt2...dan aq dh pun brjnji ngan dy...tht i will never leave her...(bg dia..xpe klu aq mngkir jnji tu...sbb dy x kesah pun)..tp bagi aq lain...seriously...mmg lain..bila aq harapkn ssuatu..mmg aq nk yg tu je..honestly la..aq x ad msa nk tipu korang yg mmbaca post nim...another thing...setiap aq mghtr msj to her...aq tnggu je...ikut la sambil ap pun..dgr lagu ke..mandi ke...makang..tusyen dn pelbagai...memang aq prlukn respon dri dia...prlu sgt2...at least dy bgtahu something...aq rsau sgt2..until x khusyuk nk lakukan smua bnda...krja skolah...blajar..even SOLAT pun aq x khusyuk...ap lg klu bnda lain..seriously...mmg mcm tu...trlalu bnyk brfkir..klu ikut heran..botak kpala aq klu duk asyik mkir gini...night before sleep..xpyh nk sleep2 punya la..mmg x leh nk tdur..kakas mana yg leh tdur klu duk asyik duk mkir ttg masalah kn..especially msalah yg kait dgn org yg dia suka kn...i know tht ad je cara nk tdur tu..tp dh nk buat mcm mna..aq x tahu...x trlintas pun msa tu...hmm...skrg ni aq hnya prlu tenang je...mmg prlukn ktenangan...SOLAT...TAWAKKAL..DOA..tp x khusyuk...mcm mna Allah nk terima amalan aq nim...tlg la...aq ckp gini bkn nk riak ke ap..mmg aq prlu ckp smua nim...soo u can understand what i feels...okay..i need space..time..to forget about all of this...n especially...I NEED SUUUU..for listening to my prob..n understand me...only her tht aq selalu ceritakn msalah.aq...only her tht faham cerita aq...i know la aq ad MOTHER/MAMA lg utk share msalah ni...cuba kau fkir...kau prnh x crita msalah pribadi kt mak kau??..segan kan??..hnya a handful of peoples tht selalu cerita msalah pribadi kt mak msing2...aq bkn nk mnghina korang...jgn fkir lain k...thts all la msalah utama aq kot..k..mmg aq x leh nk lpskn suuu tu..hrp mklum n be sharp...believe me..mmg aq x akn lps..until dy bhagia dgn org lain yg lbih baik drpd aq...

2.masalah dengan cikgu kimia aq..

ni second msalah aq...well..mcm ni...setiap kali aq msuk kelas kimia...aq yg selalu kena marah...mmg la salah aq..sbb aq x bwk buku la..x buat krja yg dy bg n pelbagai....tapi ad satu je aq nk ckp..smua bnda tu aq buat dgn x sengaja...bknnya aq metto/x hormat ckgu...n psl keje x siap...bknnya aq x nk siapkn...dh aq x fham..nk tnya ckgu pun...ckgu duk asyik mrh gitu..kakas mana brani nk tanya kn?...aq bkn nk mnghina ckgu..cuma aq prlu explain everything yg brmain dlm fkiran aq...n psl x bwa buku...padahal aq trtinggal bku dlm kelas je..bleh sgt utk amik bku tu...tp awat ckgu aq x beri masa sikit utk aq amik buku tu??..think about it la..dh la kena dnda..duk depan..brdiri dhadapan classmates aq..malu weyy...n tlg la ckgu..bg la sy msa utk mmahami smula ap yg ckgu ajar dan bg sy pluang utk mmperbetulkn sikap sy....tlg la ckgu...aq nk sgt faham kimia..cuma x sempat nk faham tu klu duk asyik kena mrh n denda n pelbagai..x ad pluang lgsung..maafkn aq klu ad mnghina ckgu atau mngata something yg mmburukkn ckgu..in sha Allah nnti..aq akn mnta maaf kt ckgu secara pribadi...in sha Allah klu sempat...sebelum SPM..

3.masalah aq dgn kak aq(not ctually sis)N.Amani Syahirah

tadi...kt tusyen..aq ngan fazir...blajar la kt rmah ckgu tu...well..studying BIO..alhamdulillah study bio td ok...n tiba2 kak many whatsapp ngan fazir..she said kt fazir (dy x tau yg aq ad dtepi fazir masa tu)...she said tht dy kecewa dgn aq..krana ap x hau...tiba2...i dont know whats going on...why she say tht??..ap salah aq??..aq yg aq buat??..aq rsa x ad buat ap2 pun..aq sndri x leh nk kawal msalah ni...td study elok2 BIO tu..n then tiba2 ad org kecewa kt kita...ap lg klu org tu ialah org yg kita syg sbagai siblings kita sndri..ya Allah..mmg stres gila2 la kot..mcm tu je msalah yg lain dtg dlm hdup aq..aq x hau nk slesai mcm mna bab kcewa kkak aq ni..aq mntk maaf sgt2 klu ad buat slh kt dy..mmg aq x tahu ap2 pun...all i know is to think psl msalah num one prority aq td..bila aq fkir ttg msalah tu..mmg aq x hiraukn ttg bnda@orang lain..seriously..i need tht prob to be closed ASAP..sbb she's the only one tht can control my emotion/mood/somthing tht playing in my mind la..n mntk maaf sgt kak sbb smua nim...klu bleh..tlg explain kt jupi...ap salah jupi..n kak...tlg bg jupi masa k..mmg emosi jupi x elok buat masa skrg..hrp akak faham la jupi...hopefully..

4.Hampir accident msa bwk motor nk p KOTA RAYA td...

ni lagi..satu hal..msalah ni mmg salah aq actually..bwk motor laju2 ktika lampu yg attend brtukar jd merah...n sebuah van yg mghimpit jalan spaya aq x leh nk lalu jalan trsbut..aq tau..bila duk mkir something ktika mmandu/mnuggang knderaan tu melalaikan kita..td mg aq lalai pun...pdahal fazir dh sruh aq brhenti...bnyk kali dy sbut td...BERHENTI!!!..BRHENTI!!!..BRHENTI!!..tp still..aq p laju2...x hiraukn dy...erk..mmg salah aq...maaffazir sbb krosakan motor mum tu..klu bleh..aq nk byr gnti rugi...klu mampu..mmg aq lalai td..maaf sgt2...aq tau la aq x ptut dpt ag lesen tu n x ptut mnunggang motosikal tu until aq dpt lesen...tp aq nk blajar...soo..hrp mum fham la aq..

aq rasa tu je msalah yg prlu aq critakn buat msa skrg..sbb topik x dtg dlm kpala aq bila emosi duk asyik x elok mcm ni...ermm..aq prlukn masa..n trying to forget everything...n waiting for her mssage(klu mmpu)...in sha Allah..skrg dh lbih 3hari..n all i need is to be silent..just like one of my bezz buddy said "Sometimes, silence is golden and let Allah fix the heart ." in sha Allah...i try my best to look foward about it...aq x nk ckp psl msalah aq..atau bnda yg mmburukkn emosi aq skrg...all i need is to tenang..n biarkn msalah tu slesai sndri wlaupun aq usaha sikit utk slesaiknnya...doa adalah satu2nya jalan utk aq..in sha Allah..i will keep my doa..n smoga Allah mkbulkn doa aq..n hrp aq dptlah tdur lena nnti..in sha Allah...

p/s kpd kak many

-"kak...jupi x pehe actually ap ksalahan jupi sapa buat kak kcewa gitu...jupi sempat baco whats app kak daley fon fazir td..malah..jupi actually yg balas whatsapp kkak tkdi..bknnya fazir..soo..mntk maaf sgt2 klu jupi ad buat saloh or something like tht...n i need space n time to be alone skrg..soo..hrp kkak pehe jupi k..thts all"